Powered By Blogger

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

"God's Plan" - "My Soliloquy"

Soliloquy -- PART I
       It was spring of 1998, when I looked up at the sky and said, "Lord, is this the life you truly have planned for me?"  No husband, no children, and though I was never one to marry prematurely, I was beginning to wonder if it were ever going to happen. 
   
       Several events had taken place... For one, my brother and his wife just returned from their honeymoon.  He handed to me a beautiful silver medallion of the Pope and said, "I had this blessed at the Vatican in Rome."  When I heard that I wore it ever day because I knew it would bring me luck.
   
        Meanwhile, my mother reassured me that God had a plan.  She stated that her sister in Italy traveled to the Vatican in Rome as well to say a special prayer for me.  Could this be?  My aunt Katherine and my brother travelling to Rome, around the same time?  When I heard this I knew something was soon going to happen.  I just didn't know when or where.

       My mother seldom prayed, but it was around this time she mentioned that she too, prayed for me everyday.  That is, she prayed that I would meet a man that would be everything I hoped and dreamed for and that truly loved me for me.

        I'd already been engaged twice: In my early 20's I'd spent 5 years with a guy.  The second engagement took place shortly after my 32nd birthday. Eventually someone asked me why a beautiful girl like me has never been married?" I replied, "because I don't want to become another statistic..."  I'd witnessed many marriages that fell apart after a year or so and I just wasn't eager for that to happen to me.  It seems like some treat marriage as though it were an experiment.  While others take the plunge just so they could say they had a beautiful wedding or feel marriage validates who they are.  I believe that society makes us feel like being married validates you as a person; and if you're not married there must be something wrong.

      My mother constantly warned us, me and my brothers that is, that going through a divorce is one of the most anguishing events that will ever take place in a persons life.  Especially if there are children involved.  Besides, she should know.

      After seeing my parents break up, I realized how much pain and suffering there was for the two of them; what's more is my brothers and I also became victims.  In short, I was not willing to settle down with a man if the relationship was not sustainable, or driven by fear.  If something brings you nothing other than pain, let it go.....

The Introduction--  
       It was June of 1998 and I received a phone call from my girlfriend Renee.  She invited me to stay at her shore house on a Saturday night because there would be a spare bunk for me on this night.  So I went....  That evening, we went out to a party.  The outdoor setup was that of a luau.  I heard some famous basketball player was throwing the outdoor party.  The inside, however, was a night club.    It was down by the beach so it was different than any other club I'd seen.   I was standing among 7 or 8 other women when all of the sudden someone came up from behind me, tapped me on the shoulder, and introduced themselves to me.  After the introduction, this gentle man said, "oh, I see your catholic," while noticing the medallion around my neck...  I replied, well that's a first!

To be continued.........................................
   






No comments:

Post a Comment